Nickie’s Nook: Oils and Books

In no way am I grateful for my pain itself. I’m grateful for the things I’ve learned due to my challenges, but not my pain itself. but I have found things I’m grateful for which have come into my life because of my CRPS and other tough stuff. It’s almost Thanksgiving and everyone is thinking and posting about the things they’re grateful for. Gratitude boosts our resilience. While I would be grateful to get rid of chronic pain from our world, I haven’t been given that power. Given that, I think gratitude for the stuff that I’ve seen and done because of blindness, CRPS, depression, anxiety and migraines is the best course of valor.

Blindness Over CRPS!

You might be surprised to hear that I’m grateful to be blind. Truthfully, I am! It’s inconvenient at many times but overall, it’s given me so many blessings. It’s a part of my identity. I’ve met so many amazing people because of my blindness. Also, I’ve found that being blind for the first 16 years of my life gave me the resources and skills like advocacy and adaptation which I might have had to learn at the same time I was dealing with and adjusting to my chronic illnesses. It’s almost as if blindness was a case of college preparing me for the full-time job of life with chronic illness.

The Blessings Of Being Blind

People who are sighted are often surprised when they learn that I wouldn’t choose to get rid of my blindness or that I would prefer blindness to chronic pain. That’s because they haven’t lived as a blind person who was born that way. As I mentioned, blindness is a part of me. It’s just the way I am. The thing is, blindness introduced me to so many amazing people I would never have met as a sighted person. Whether it’s the teachers who taught me Braille as a kid or the ones who are teaching me technology and cooking skills now, or the many many blind people I’ve become friends with in the blindness community, I have gained a broader group of friends and allies I wouldn’t have met as a sighted person. I’m thinking of two people especially: one, my friend and mentor Marlaina was introduced to me when I was in 3rd grade. I was being stubborn about many things such as not wanting to learn Braille or the $2,000 piece of technology which my dad had purchased to allow me to write papers in Braille and print them out in print format. My Dad was seeking help and Marlaina became a mentor, a cross between friend, big sister and mentor who was my parents’ age. She was amazing, helping guide me to become more successful. She convinced me to learn Braille and become more independent. She passed away 5 years ago and I miss her dearly. A more recent friend is my friend and wellness advocate Hayley. She and I are very close and she’s been my ally and incredibly supportive. I probably wouldn’t have met her if I weren’t blind because she’s blind and I met her through the American Council of the Blind when she taught classes on essential oils. She’s a friend who makes a huge difference in my life as she listens to me when I’m struggling but more importantly, she and I have many things in common. She loves me for who I am and helps me see myself as more than my chronic pain.

Compassion

CRPS and migraines, not to mention my other conditions, have made me much more compassionate. Feeling pain sucks, but because I’ve felt such severe pain and also experienced the pain of feeling miss-understood, I want to spare others from feeling such pain. That’s helped me feel greater compassion toward people who are in different situations and helped me give people the benefit of the doubt.

Using Many Tools

This is something I did before CRPS, but I do it even more now. I use many different tools to deal with a challenge. As a blind person, I used different tools like talking books, Braille and assistive technology, but I didn’t need to use very many off the books ideas. Now that I deal with pain and mental illness, I’ve had to learn not to count on one or two tools because often they don’t cover all of the problems I’m trying to deal with. For example, when I started with CRPS, I tended to just use meds, physical therapy and nerve blocks. Now, I’ve learned to add in many other tools like meditation, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, oils, supplements and heat packs just to name a small selection.

Essential Oils!

I’m not saying I use oils to treat, cure or prevent any illness, but I do use oils to help myself. I’ve found that using oils has many benefits, but mainly, they give me many options. I enjoy playing with them to make various blends to support different systems or just make something that smells good. I love being creative with the ways I can use oils in DIY projects. Basically, I like having fun. But I don’t know if I would’ve even looked into oils if I didn’t have CRPS and other crappy conditions. When I was looking for things that might help, I took an integrative medicine class and learned about essential oils. It peeked my interest and so I tried them. I’ve found much joy in experimenting with the benefits of essential oils. I’m grateful to have found something I can fully appreciate!

Building Resilience!

Resilience is learning to grow in difficult times. When faced with a setback, people who are resilient bounce back. Chronic pain and depression have given me many setbacks. I’ve learned to become more resilient. Unfortunately, resilience isn’t something you learn when everything’s going perfectly. It’s something you have to build through experience. I’m grateful that I’ve been able to take advantage of my chronic illness and mental illness to build resilience.

No matter where you find yourself today, I hope you take advantage of your time to think about what you’re thankful or grateful for!